Saturday, July 28, 2012

Bad Songs

So the other day I came across this blog post about 10 songs kids love, but shouldn't.

Here's the list (in case you don't want to check out the link).
1. Starships by Nicki Minaj
2. Can You Blow my Whistle by Flo Rida
3. Tik Tok by Ke$ha
4. Party Rock Anthem by LMFAO
5. Wild Ones by Flo Rida
6. Single Runaway by Kanye West
7. Glad You Came by Wanted
8. Somebody That I Used to Know by Goyte
9. Domino by Jesse J
10. Scream by Usher

Here's what I have to say (like you, or anyone else cares, but that's why I have a blog).

1. Why is anyone listening to Nicki Minaj? This is a serious question.

2. Anyone who lets their children list to FLO RIDA needs parenting classes STAT. Are you freaking kidding me? Flo Rida? Of *course* he's on the list twice. Just give him one spot for "all songs" and free up some space, will ya?

3. Yeah, that song is pretty bad. Some of her songs are less bad, but Ke$ha is one naughty young lady and most of her songs are pretty inappropriate for kids.

4. I've heard a rumor there's a "clean" version of this song. I need to find it because (and I only slightly hesitate to admit this), I kinda like LMFAO.

5. See #2 - this second Flo Rida spot could have been taken up with Lady Gaga's "Love Games". I don't want Penelope to sing about taking a ride on a dildo stick, pleaseandthankyou.

6. I haven't heard this song, so I'm assuming she's right about this one. But it's Kanye West, when has he EVER been known to be appropriate for kids?

7. "Glad You Came" should not be on the list. You know what should? "Last Friday Night" by Katy Perry. Have you listened to the lyrics? It glorifies substance abuses, causal sex, and being a f*cking twit.

Don't get me wrong. I let my kids listen to Katy Perry - but not her entire lexicon. Her songs are catchy and it's 1 million times better than that horrible Kidz Bop crap (if you buy Kidz Bop and are my friend then let it be known that you are dead to me. I can be friends with Republicans, the religious, Bears fans, and even the odd Dodgers fan. But not someone who profanes the ears of their children with Kidz Bop).

The point is? I would much, much, much rather my children listen to "Glad You Came", thinking the drink he's handing her is juice or milk than have my kids know the words to Perry's "Last Friday Night."

8. Here's another one that doesn't deserve the list. The blogger calls it stalker-ish. I think she needs to listen to The Police's "Every Breath You Take". Because *that* is what a stalker song sounds like. Not Goyte's break-up anthem.

9. Who is Jesse J and why do her parents let her dress like a hooker? How old is she? 12?

10. Yeah, parents who let their kids listen to this song need some classes. There are Usher songs that are ok, so it's not an Usher thing, just a this-song-thing.

I remember when I was a kid, we used to listen to George Michael's "I Want Your Sex" & Elton John's "The B*tch is Back" - only my parents would change the lyrics as we sang in the car. Neither my brother or I turned out too badly.

I get not wanting to listen to Yo-Gabba-Gabba & The Fresh Beat Band all day (especially The Fresh Beat Band). And I *especially* get not wanting to subject yourself to the drivel of Kidz Bop (see #7). So listen to original works - listen to pop, rock, country, R&B, bluegrass, gospel, even rap. Listen away. Expose your kids to a little bit of everything - just not Flo Rida. Please.

And change the channel. Because they may just be songs. And you may not think it matters - but kids absorb a lot. We communicate social norms, values, and behaviors through song. We've done so since humanity was born. We should all just be a little more aware of what are kids are absorbing...

1 comment:

  1. That's hilarious. I introduced my kids to all genres and decades of music--even the tone-deaf ones. I did try to make sure the content didn't sing them straight into being serial killers, stalkers, manifesto authors, fad clothing fashionistas, or politicians.

    I think I've done pretty well, since at 19 & 20, they are none of those things and have a strong appreciation for good music.


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