I should be doing homework

So I have to write a unit lesson plan and I have a paper due by Saturday. I should be doing those things... obviously I'm not. Although I think I'm going to take a lesson plan for my last class (revolving around the novel The Death of Ivan Ilyich) and expand that into an entire unit. It shouldn't be too hard to do. So I have the groundwork done, but have to get into the specifics for this assignment.

I am SO DONE with school. Unfortunately school isn't quite so done with me. I will preserver however, especially after my Uncle Wes' memorial service. We were all reminded that day how much my Uncle prized education (he was a high school Principal) and so my Master's Degree will be dedicated to the memory of Uncle Wes. I'll probably even make the trek down to San Diego for my graduation ceremony (I didn't walk when I got my BA, which disappointed my mother). My ultimate goal is to get my PhD, but I have to wait until the kids are in school before I do that. I can work as a teacher for 6 years and then go back... and then I can be one of those tweed wearing super liberal college professors - only I don't really love tweed.

Speaking of Uncle Wes, the memorial was Sunday and like I noted on Facebook - I really enjoyed spending time with my family, even though the occasion was a sad one. The memorial and the reception afterward were very cathartic, at least for me. I hope that others felt the same. In a lot of ways it reminded me of my Grandpa Vern's memorial, Uncle Wes and Grandpa Vern went to the same high school (Uncle Wes' brother, my Grandpa Larry, was my Grandpa Vern's best friend in high school... in fact, my Grandpa Vern ended up marrying Grandpa's Larry's cousin, my Grandma Ruth. The story is long and involved, but very, very interesting).

Anyway, Wes has grandchildren who were the same age as I was when Grandpa Vern passed - and it brought back a lot of memories about how I felt when Grandpa died. It sucks having someone you love pass away, but quite frankly it sucks even more when you're a preteen/teenager. In my opinion, the most difficult time to loose a loved one is between the ages of 12 & 17. I think it's because at that age you're old enough to understand what's going on, but not yet old enough to be able to process things like an adult... maybe it's puberty that does it. Maybe it's emotional maturity - heck, it could even be brain development. Whatever it is, my Grandfather's death when I was 12 hit me much, much harder than the death of any subsequent loved one. Of course, I'm basing my opinions off of my own personal experience - so I could be totally and completely wrong about the whole 12-17 thing.

Ok, that was quite the tangent... to get back on track: the memorial. I cried, but I also laughed - it's hard not to when hearing stories of Uncle Wes' shenanigans, the man had fun and got into trouble (and had fun getting into trouble). He was very smart, very loud, very opinionated, and very well loved. The high school gym was overflowing with people - and there were still more who couldn't make it that day.

Penelope did pretty well for being 10 1/2 months. Bryan took her out near the end to walk around, but I was proud of her. She thought that the loudspeaker was hilarious and would laugh almost every time a voice would be projected out of it, she would also laugh when we would laugh at one of Uncle Wes' "Wes-isms" (my favorite being: Are you working at being a smart ass, or is it a natural talent?). She didn't get the joke, but she just wanted to laugh along with the crowd, Uncle Wes probably would have found it incredibly amusing.

I am sad that Penny never got to meet him - she would have LOVED him. She'll never get to meet a lot of really wonderful people... but such is life.

Reflections

So it's been a rollercoaster of a weekend and it's only Friday (our weekend started Thursday). So much has happened that I really haven't had time to process it all yet, most of it was good - and some of it was not. I guess the best way to sort it all out is to start at the beginning.

Thursday morning. We had our 14 week appointment with the midwives. This means I'm in the second trimester (yea!) and it was a really great appointment. We heard the heartbeat (and Penelope, standing next to the "exam table" was dancing to the whump-whump-whump of the baby's heartbeat - too cute). I put exam table in quotations because the table at our midwives looks and feels nothing like the exam tables at traditional doctor's offices. It's much more comfortable and inviting, but I really can't think of another term for it.

Anyway, the heartbeat was 152 beats per minute which is very good. More good news, there's only ONE heartbeat :) No twins for us. Other good things: My uterus measured at the right amount of weeks (which is another indicator that the baby is growing normally and there's only one in there), I gained 1 lbs since last month (which puts me at 5 under from my weight before this pregnancy - although no where near my weight pre-Penny), and my midwives think everything sounds and looks good. My blood pressure was pretty low (90/60) and Marlene remarked that she didn't know how I was standing upright - although low blood pressure isn't abnormal for me during pregnancy (or when I'm not pregnant) but I have been getting dizzy a lot lately so I just have to watch myself.

After our appointment we met up with my parents and drove to Tahoe for my cousin's wedding. The wedding was at a casino, and it was really nice - both Jodi and Ken seemed really happy... Ken even got a little teary during the ceremony :)

The only downer was that during the dinner we found out that my Uncle Wes (my Grandpa's brother) had passed away. It wasn't unexpected but it was still very sad... and this is the part of the weekend (thus far) that I haven't really gotten the time to process. I don't know how much I'll get to tonight (since we're all exhausted) but I need to talk a little bit about my Uncle before I sign off.

I have very fond memories of my Uncle... growing up we didn't see him all the time since he lived in Chico and we were in Sacramento, but we saw him often enough for me to grow to love him very much. He was a bit larger than life - literally - the man was TALL. And bald (well, I'm sure he had hair at one point, but the Uncle Wes in my memories was always bald). He was incredibly intelligent, had a great sense of humor, and was (at least for us kids) a gentle giant. He was a high school principal and could be stern, but that wasn't really a side of him I ever saw. I saw him at holidays or at my great-grandparent's house (both of whom were also very tall and very loving) - and those times Uncle Wes seemed to always be laughing.

Of course, talking about Uncle Wes always reminds me of my great-grandparents who were wonderful wonderful people. I miss them a lot - they passed away when I was in high school and if I remember correctly they were both in their 90s... I have some very wonderful memories of them both and it makes me a little sad that my kids will never get the chance to meet them. But I'm very, very lucky that I got so much time with them, many people never even get to meet their great-grandparents.

Back to Uncle Wes... after my great-grandparents died we saw less of that side of the family. This was for a variety of reasons, one of which was distance. We would still see Uncle Wes on occasion; mainly for holidays.

When Bryan and I got engaged, we had a couple of conversations about who we wanted to officiate our wedding. I felt very strongly that I wanted family involved - someone special... and Bryan gave me the go-ahead to ask whomever I wanted. So I asked Uncle Wes.

He said yes. He even went online and got ordained from one of those non-denominational churches so it could be official (our ceremony was not religious, unless you count Dr. Seuss as a religious leader). He performed his son's wedding a few months before ours (he told me it was his practice ceremony, although I'm quite certain that he did an amazing job and no one would have been able to tell he'd never done it before).

Our ceremony was perfect. I couldn't imagine a better ceremony - it was funny, touching, and delivered in his wonderful speaking voice. It meant so much to me to have my Uncle (well, great-Uncle) be the one to pronounce Bryan and I husband and wife...

So to honor my Uncle Wes - and because I really love watching this - here's our wedding ceremony. The video is a little shaky (we didn't have a tripod) and the sound is so-so in spots, but it's really the only thing I have and I feel the need to hear his voice again. Thank you Uncle Wes, we love you very much.