Halfway point - 20 weeks

Today I am officially 20 weeks pregnant with the Third Musketeer.

Comparison pics are below if you'd prefer to skip the text update.

Everything looks fine thus far. Genetic testing came back clear, ultrasound came back with nothing but good news (baby is measuring on schedule, is 50% for weight, all organs in place and looking good, pretty much a normal healthy baby from all that they can see). My uterus is measuring exactly where it should. My vitals are good.

Baby's heartbeat today was between 125-130, which is in the normal range. It's lower, so my midwives now think it's a boy; but just 4 weeks ago it was in the 160s so they thought it was a girl.

I think it's a human. Pretty sure I'm right.

We had a girls name picked, but Bryan found another he liked so we've opened up the list. Still no consensus on a boy's name. We do agree on middle names though. Claire for a girl and Vernon for a boy. So at least we agree on something.

I'm ok if we just have a list of names at delivery time and then choose that day or a few days after. Seemed to work with Griffin.

And now for the pictures.

20 weeks with Baby #3

20 weeks with Griffin

26 weeks with Penelope

Comparison Pics

It's been ages since I did a true update, but school is in session and I don't have time for much of anything. Besides, I go to bed at 8:30 lately so there's not much updated happening.

But I DID (finally) find time for this. Belly comparison pics.

Things to note.

1. I was TINY with Penny, but she was my first so duh.
2. My arms get bigger, why is that? I'm not growing a baby in my arms.
3. My belly is rounder this time, IMO.

So here's 19 weeks with Penny:

And 16 weeks with the Bubs:

And now 16 weeks with Baby #3:

Summer and reading

This post is mainly to write down some updates so that I don't forget these things later. No pics this time around, just an informational post.

This summer we enrolled both kids in a summer reading course. Griffin is in the 4-5 year old pre-K class and Penelope is in the pre-2nd grade class. For the last few months she's been reading independently and her reading level quickly progressed - the child always has a book in her hand (or a marker, she's also slightly obsessed with drawing).

It reminds me a lot of me and I've had to tell her the same things my parents used to say to me.

"Please put down the book and eat."
"Please put on your seatbelt before you start reading."
"Please close the book while you walk across the street/parking lot."
"Please close the book and go to bed."

I love that she's a bookworm, but it can be a little exasperating as a parent. She's reading everything - the baby books, the level 1, 2, & 3 books, chapter books (like this series of Nancy Clancy books), and together we've read Charlotte's Web, started the Harry Potter series, and are going to read Island of the Blue Dolphins.

Best.Stage.Ever.

She also started piano lessons today with a hilariously crazy and wonderful Russian pianist. It's going to be a great fit.

Griffin will wait another year for piano - he wants to play the drums, but we're going to have him learn piano and how to read music before we get him drum lessons.

Other than that and the disastrous swimming lessons (which we quit midway through, FTR), we've been hanging out a home. Between the trampoline and everyday errands, we keep pretty busy.

Bubby's new 2 wheel bike came in the mail the other day and we're just waiting on Sissy's. Then we'll add bike riding lessons into our daily routine. Ideally they'll be able to ride to school once the school year begins (with my Dad, of course).

We went to Wyoming again this year for B's grandma's 80th birthday and that was a mostly good trip. I have some pictures I'll try and post later in a longer post. The kids had a blast and it was nice to see some of his family that we rarely see, even when we're in WY.

That's all I can remember for now. Goodnight!

#mybirthcontrolstory

This whole Hobby Lobby decision makes my head and my heart ache. Especially combined with all the recent restrictions on Planned Parenthood clinics; this past year has been a bad one for women's health.

So I feel the need to tell #mybirthcontrolstory so that maybe people who don't understand why these issues are so important will start to see what the fuss is about. It's about people, it's about health, it's about an individual's rights.

And this one is about me:

I had been on various forms of hormonal birth control (think "the pill") since high school. The pill, for me, was much more about regulating my period and getting rid of my awful cramps than actual pregnancy prevention, but as I continued into my 20s pregnancy prevention became much more important (although I still used the pill as medicine because horrible periods don't just go away once you turn 20).

When I had health insurance, I would get my medication from my doctor. When I didn't have health insurance I would visit Planned Parenthood. They were a godsend, I could get an exam (which screens for cancer & STDs) and get the medication I needed at a price I could afford. I don't know what I would have done without them, because birth control isn't exactly cheap. I tried a variety of methods then - the pill, the ring, the patch - trying to find the medication that worked best for me.

Shortly before Bryan and I got married, I started having these dizzy spells and weird "floaters" in my vision. I went to see an opthamologist and after the exam he said (with grave concern in his voice):

"Are you on birth control?"

My answer was yes... there was a pause, and then this "You need to see your doctor. Today."

So I called. I couldn't get an appointment (this was campus health insurance, I was a student at CSU Sacramento and didn't have employer health insurance). The nurse who took my call told me, without mincing words "Stop taking your birth control until you see the doctor. It could kill you."

So I stopped.

During my appointment, my doctor informed me that my symptoms - which were more numerous than the dizziness & vision problems - meant that I could never take synthetic hormones again without putting myself at risk for stroke. My birth control options shrunk considerably.

So my doctor and I decided on a diaphragm. I was getting married and we wanted kids at some point, so the IUD was out.

B and I married 2 months later. Penelope was conceived 3 months after that. So much for effective birth control.

After Penny, our insurance situation didn't improve. I had graduated, I was working as a nanny (no insurance), and the insurance Bryan got through work was terrible and limited. The diaphragm was out, we couldn't afford an IUD, and I couldn't take hormonal birth control.

Hence, 7 months after Penelope's birth, we got pregnant with Griffin.

I know at this point, some people would say things like "well, that's what happens when you have sex" or "if you didn't want a baby you shouldn't have had sex." I don't understand these perspectives. A part of a healthy marriage (and a healthy relationship) is sex. It is normal. It is natural. Yes, sometimes pregnancy is a result, but as it's my body and my marriage, I should be able to make decisions about when I want to get pregnant. Birth control allows me to do this.

Griffin was born 9 months later.

I do not regret having my son (or daughter) even though both were unplanned. But having 2 babies so close together was difficult. I suffered from PPD, I lost my job because of my pregnancy... I was lucky to qualify for WIC (which was both helpful and a sometimes humiliating experience) and the kids were able to qualify for MediCal (neither B nor I could).

Again, Planned Parenthood came to my rescue. I was finally able to get an IUD at a price I could afford (free).

When I finished my Masters program and got a job in Salinas, we all breathed a huge sigh of relief. We were all covered. My insurance covers any form on birth control I need. We are lucky.

But so many women, who are just like me, are not so lucky. They don't have the family support in place to be able to handle unplanned pregnancies, their state may have enacted legislature that forced the closing of Planned Parenthood clinics and thus they cannot access the birth control and annual exams they need, they make work for a company like Hobby Lobby who uses belief instead of science to make decisions about what is, and is not, appropriate medical coverage.

These women deserve better. They deserve a government who doesn't infantalize them, but rather allows them to make informed decisions for themselves. They deserve an employer who keeps their noses out of their employee's health care decisions.

They deserve better.

Irony

Irony is, perhaps, my favorite thing to teach.

I have often used stories like "Lamb to the Slaughter" or "Oedipus" to teach students about dramatic, verbal, and situational irony.

Now I have a new story. That of the Swim Lessons.

You see this year, after a 3 year hiatus, both children have been enrolled in swim lessons at the Y. Which, in and of itself, is not ironic.

So I must begin at the beginning...

My children were born at home (warning, the 1st link contains birth pictures but no vaginas). Penelope after an 8 hour labor, and Griffin after only 7. (side note: I rediscovered my old blog).

The births were rather similar- same midwives, same room, same pants, same pig-tail french braids (thanks mom!), same portable horse trough filled with water. That's right, both babies went directly from my womb into lukewarm water before I pulled them out and held them in my arms. Both children swam before they did anything. At all. Ever.

Which is why THIS:

Baffles me. It is Griffin utterly refusing to get in the pool.

A number of people have attempted to get our recalcitrant rhino into the pool:

• His swim instructor, Matt, who has the patience of a saint.
• The lifeguard. All 3 of the ones we've had on duty throughout the week.
• Me. Using a combination of logic (failed), bribes (failed), and passive aggressive threats (triple failed).
• His grandpa.
• His dad.

And this is as far as he's gotten:

Actually, that's not entirely true. I encouraged Matt to just bring him in. This is as far as he's gotten:

Don't let his smirk fool you, he was in tears about 5 seconds later. Big old crocodile tears.

Isn't it ironic? Don't you think? A little too ironic...

What drives me nuts is that all he can talk about the next morning is "when are we going to the pool?" and "is it 3 o'clock yet, can I go swimming now?"

In less-ironic-but-still-semi-frustrating-news Penelope will get in the water but is terrified of it and tenses up the moment she's asked to do anything other than stand.

See, she'll jump in, but only if she's holding her instructors hands (who used to be a Freshmen of mine, FTR), and then only because when she does jump in she never gets anything more than her chest wet because she's over 6 inches taller than the 3.5 foot shallow end.

For children who were BORN IN THE D**M WATER, I just do.not.get.it.

A Few of Their Favorite Things

So we have about and hour and a half before our flight leaves to take us back to California (currently in Denver after a short trip up to Wyoming to visit Bryan's family).

I have a limited number of pictures of the trip, and I might have more time to post on the flight - provided the children find ways to keep themselves occupied that don't include my laptop.

But since I have some time and since the kids are currently busy reading (Penelope) and playing math games (Griffin), then I can recount this conversation we had in the car a few days ago.

Bryan was off playing golf with his dad and the kids and I were headed to Casper's Science Zone after having made a very essential pit stop at Starbucks (because altitude sickness sucks and Starbucks makes everything better... seriously about the altitude sickness though, I get it EVERY time we come up to visit and it makes me pretty miserable. I could deal with the nausea, but the headaches are crazy and are only dulled with pain meds).

So. In the car. Driving through Casper.

Penny: I love this day, it's my favorite! (she says this about every day though)
Griffin: No, it's not my favorite. (he was already homesick)
Me: So Bubby, what is your favorite?
G: (without pausing to think) Lego Batman!!!!!!!
M: Penny? What about you?
P: Art. I'm obsessed with art just like Bubby is obsessed with video games.
M: He sure is... so what do you guys think is Daddy's favorite thing?
P: Golf:
G: Hockey!
P: No, I don't think it's golf after all. I think his favorite thing is tickling us.
G: Yeah, that's his favorite.
M: So what do you guys think my favorite thing is?
P: Reading!
G: Snuggling.
P: Yeah, Mommy you like to snuggle a lot.
M: That I do... what about Grandpa, what's his favorite thing.
G: Watching us.
P: Yep.
M: Granny?
G: ummmm.....
P: Giving us kisses.
G: Yes, kisses and hugs.
M: What about Great Grandma Barbara?
G: It's when we visit her.
P: Yeah, she likes that a lot.
M: Harley-Quinn?
G: Seeing us. (which is partially true, but the dog's favorite this is really seeing our babysitter Alexis)
M: Granny & Grandpa's dogs?
G: Seeing us, they love to see us.
M: Really? My guess would be eating garbage.
P: Gross!

I was amused - mostly because everyone's favorite things seemed to revolve around them.

They had a good time in Wyoming though. And altitude sickness aside, it was a nice visit. Short though - but it's hard to find the time to get away and go out there. The plane ride to Denver isn't that bad, but the 4 hour car ride to Casper is exhausting. We might go out again this summer for Bryan's grandmother's 80th birthday.

We are all ready to be home though. Today was the Denver Museum of Natural History & Science with some friends that we haven't seen since we moved to Salinas (they used to live in Sac too, in fact Kim used to babysit the kids when they were little and we would often have playdates with them). It was really nice to see them - I miss so many of that group. We got to see some of the other regular play-daters when we were in Sacramento last weekend too. While I don't miss the city of Sacramento, I do miss the friends we had there.

 More later, I hope. I'm not teaching summer school this year so I'm hoping that I'll be able to blog more often than I have been. Hopefully we'll fill our summer with swimming lessons and trips to the beach. I'm looking forward to a real break.

Tax Day Ramblings

I haven't written in a long while because forces outside of my control (ok, not really) have conspired to keep me so busy I don't have time to vacuum my floors (unfortunately true) let alone blog.

But it is spring break, I've filed my taxes (ouch), and have had a celebratory glass of wine. My youngest child turns 4 tomorrow (cue tears) and I absolutely REFUSE to do any work (not true, I'm e-mailing people in between writing sentences for this post).

Griffin's birthday makes me sad because he is my baby and I have to face that there really is no baby left in him. He's a big kid. A very big kid... and I desperately miss the chubby cheeked baby stage where they actually FIT on your abdomen when they snuggle (G tries to fit... he does not). There are things from the baby stage I don't miss (say, teething... or the half a dozen wake ups from Sir Griff) but I genuniely like babies and I do miss the baby wearing (which really means I miss having complete control over their whereabouts).

Has anyone else noticed my propensity to use parenthesis as my inner monologue? Have I always done that?

Anyway. Kids.

Are big. LE SIGH.

Penelope is reading. READING. Like, all by herself! She reads everything you put in front of her and delights in reading to herself and to anyone willing to listen. It is, I noticed, mostly whole words with a generous sprinkling of phonics. I had assumed that early reading would be more phonics - but I'm not a reading teacher so what the heck do I know? All I know is that she is reading and enjoying it. Her "report card" was very positive this trimester and she still loves school... which is good.

Griffin loves to pretend to read and while he's warmed up to school, he still doesn't quite love it with the same enthusiams as his sister. His new obsession is Lego Batman (don't get me started, not my idea).

When discussing his obsession at lunch today he asked what "obsession" meant. My mom asked him "what do you think it means?" and he said:

"When you really want to do something and nothing else."

Yup. Sums it up quite nicely.

The positive is that since he can only play for a limited amount of time each day and he has to clean up in order to earn video game time, that the house has remained remarkably picked up over the last few weeks. So that's a plus.

Oh, softball! Penelope started softball and she loves it. Bryan is coaching and I'm the manager and I love it less than she does, to be honest. It's not the playing, it's the actual managing that is pretty much awful. I won't do it again. I'll chaperone, I'll even coach, but I will NOT manage.

I'm glad she likes it though, she's made some friends and her coordination is improving, so that's good. I think we'll sign Griffin up for T-Ball next year and keep her in softball... who knows. I guess it all depends on what they like and how much time Bryan and I have to shuttle them to various practices and games.

The rest of our lives are work, which is boring to talk about. I'm so thankful it's Spring Break because I needed it. My students did too. All work and no play makes us all a little loopy, so I'm looking forward to having some (hopefully) reenvigorated students next week. We really only have 5 weeks of school left before summer, which is practically nothing. I have to finish Romeo & Juliet, go through the Greek gods, and teach Oedipus Rex in 5 weeks. Eep! We'll get it done, I have some pretty awesome students this year.

Ok, time to sleep. Maybe I'll have the time and/or energy for a blog post before the school year ends (doubtful) but since I've already said I'm not teaching summer school I may actually get time this summer to blog (or, better yet, to finish the damn novel I started over a year ago).

Happy Jackie Robinson Day!