One of the ladies in Mother's Support Network posted this article (http://www.continuum-concept.org/reading/whosInControl.html). The subtitle is: It appears that many parents of toddlers, in their anxiety to be neither negligent nor disrespectful, have gone
overboard in what may seem to be the other direction.
It's a really interesting article, and has given me a lot to think about especially now that Penny is getting a little older. Now she gets constant attention, we play and interact practically all day - she's the center of our world. Of course, she's also only 2 months old - and so when she cries it's because she actually needs something. Of course, we haven't put our lives on hold either. We take her everywhere - the mall, the grocery store, my weekly support group, she spends time at my parents twice a week, and comes to work with me on the weekends.
I know that parenthood necessitates changes in our lifestyle, but I don't want everything to revolve around the baby - it sets up unrealistic expectations for her (the world won't revolve around her) and it pushes Bryan and I (and our marriage) to the outside. Ideally the three of us become a center as we're all equally important in our family.
It may not be all that easy either, Western society tends to encourage "baby first" which often translates into "me first" when those babies grow up. Of course, this isn't always the case - but I do see it more often than not.
1 month ago